J. ANNE

I’m not sure how to start talking about the last nine years, but I read something yesterday that hit home for me.  On Facebook, nonetheless.  I read about how a young woman will never understand how much her relationship with her husband will change once they have a family.  I can definitely relate to that story.  About six years ago we decided that we were ready for a family.  We were probably too young, but we threw a little caution to the wind and did it anyway.  You were 28.  I was 26.  We loved each other, of course, but I don’t know that either one of us were really ready… or that we really understood… what starting a family meant.  It meant that you and I would never be the same.  And we aren’t.  The things I loved about you then don’t even compare to the things that I love about you now.  Some of the things that I love so much, aren’t even things that come from you; rather, they come from our baby boys.  I sink deeper into love with you each time that I hear Hudson say… “Mom, how many numbers until Daddy gets home?”  Or Griffin says, “Daddy… car… work.”  And even more recently when Brody is in my arms and he smiles so big at you waiting… just waiting for you to reach out for his tickles… because he knows that you are always going to.

Each time that the door opens and the dinging of the alarm tells our boys to celebrate your return, my heart explodes.  They love you so much.  I love you so much.  Our lives aren’t about you and I any longer… so even though we celebrate our ninth year of marriage today… it is hard to remember just you and me walking through the door of the church on June 6, 2004… because you and me no longer exist.  We are we.  We are us.  And ‘we’ isn’t complete with you.

So happy anniversary, Fraser.  The first three years are a bit of a blur, but the last six sure have been a crazy ride.

Photo courtesy of Natalie Ann Photography